Chapter 5 - ADAM’S DEFENSE
Adam’s defense was simple.
He was a strict parent.
I was emotional.
The video began too late.
Sophie had behavioral problems.
The relatives were influenced by the chaos.
He never intended serious harm.
Some people believed him.
That was difficult.
Because Adam did not look like the kind of father strangers imagine when they hear the word abuse.
Successful.
Funny.
Coached youth basketball.
Volunteered at school.
Remembered teachers’ birthdays.
He loved Sophie.
I never denied that.
Love was not the issue.
Control was.
His attorney requested supervised contact eventually.
Sophie’s therapist recommended waiting until Sophie was ready.
Adam wrote letters.
The first:
Daddy misses you. I’m sorry everyone got upset.
Therapist rejected it.
Why?
No responsibility.
Second:
I’m sorry I scared you.
Better.
Still incomplete.
Third:
I hurt you when I was angry. That was wrong. You did not cause it.
Sophie read that one.
Then folded it.
“Do I have to answer?”
“No.”
“Will he be sad?”
“Probably.”
She looked frightened.
I took her hand.
“His sadness is not your job.”
That sentence became one of the hardest things for her to learn.
Because both grandmothers had taught the opposite.
Keep Dad calm.
Keep Grandma happy.
Keep Mom from worrying.
Children in dysfunctional families often become emotional employees without anyone calling it work.
May you like
I was done letting Sophie work for us.
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