Chapter 6 - SUSAN’S ENVELOPE
Susan arrived at my lawyer’s office without warning.
She carried an envelope.
Her face looked ten years older.
“I need to talk.”
My lawyer said:
“Through counsel.”
“I fired mine.”
That was either brave or foolish.
Probably both.
She placed the envelope down.
Bank statements.
Gavin had sent Susan money.
Not thousands.
Tens of thousands.
Over three years.
She claimed they were “investment returns.”
They were actually transfers from accounts linked to insurance payouts.
“I didn't know.”
I believed she believed that.
Not enough.
“You defended him.”
“He’s my son.”
“That didn't make him right.”
Susan cried.
“I know.”
That was new.
“Why now?”
She handed me another paper.
A letter Gavin sent from jail.
Mom, if Mara keeps pushing this, tell everyone about her antidepressants. Make it sound like she had episodes before.
I stared.
I had taken antidepressants briefly after Lucy’s second hospitalization.
Gavin knew.
Susan continued:
“He wants me to lie.”
“You already lied for him.”
Her face crumpled.
“Yes.”
No excuse.
“I told myself defending him was loving him.”
I said nothing.
“I think I helped him become someone who believed consequences were optional.”
That sounded painfully accurate.
She agreed to testify about the money and the letter.
Did I forgive her?
No.
Did I respect the decision?
Yes.
Both could exist.
Susan never saw Lucy during the case.
She asked twice.
I said no.
The third time, she stopped asking.
May you like
That was the beginning of her understanding.
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