Chapter 9 - THE LETTER FROM MY SISTER
Chloe sent me a letter in August.
It arrived in a plain envelope.
My name was written in her familiar handwriting.
I recognized the slant of the letters.
The way she crossed her t's.
The tiny heart she sometimes drew above the letter i.
I stared at it for nearly an hour before opening it.
Ellie,
I know I have no right to ask you to read this.
But I need you to know the truth.
I was jealous of you.
Not because you had more money or a better job.
Because you always seemed to know who you were.
After Mom and Dad died, you became the person who held everything together.
You paid bills. You helped me finish school. You remembered birthdays. You made Christmas feel normal.
Everyone praised you.
I loved you.
But sometimes I hated how much I needed you.
I stopped reading.
My hands were shaking.
Then I continued.
When Aaron and I broke up, I felt like a failure.
Julian listened to me.
He made me feel grown-up and important.
I knew it was wrong.
I knew I was betraying you.
But I kept telling myself it would end.
Then I found out I was pregnant.
I knew Aaron could be the father.
I also knew Julian desperately wanted children.
When he said the babies were his, I didn't correct him.
I was afraid that if I told the truth, everyone would leave.
Tears blurred the page.
I know now that I made the very thing I feared happen.
I lost you.
I hurt Julian.
And I brought two innocent children into a terrible situation.
I have contacted Aaron. He has agreed to take an appropriate paternity test.
Whatever the result, I will take responsibility for my sons.
I'm not asking you to forgive me.
I only want you to know that none of this was your fault.
You were a good sister.
Better than I deserved.
Love, Chloe.
I folded the letter.
Placed it on the table.
Then cried.
Not because I wanted Chloe back.
Because I remembered the little girl who used to crawl into my bed during thunderstorms.
The teenager who clung to me at our parents' funeral.
The young woman who had once promised we would always be family.
Naomi found me sitting on the floor.
She read my expression.
“Chloe?”
I nodded.
Naomi sat beside me.
“Do you want to answer?”
I shook my head.
“Not yet.”
She took my hand.
“Then don't.”
For the first time, I understood that love could survive without reconciliation.
I could love the sister I remembered.
May you like
I could wish her children well.
And still decide that she no longer had access to my life.
