Chapter 14 - THE LETTER HE NEVER ASKED ME TO ANSWER
Damian wrote me a letter on the second anniversary of our separation.
It arrived in a plain envelope.
No expensive stationery.
No flowers.
No instructions.
I opened it after closing the bookstore.
Emma,
I used to think being a good husband meant keeping danger away from our home.
I never understood that I had brought another kind of danger inside it.
I made you doubt yourself.
I let my family humiliate you.
I treated your pain as an inconvenience because admitting it was real would have required me to change.
I read your diary without permission. I was wrong to do that.
What I found broke my heart, but I know the greater tragedy is that you lived those moments without the support you deserved.
I cannot undo five years.
I cannot give you back the days you spent crying alone.
I cannot change the night you lost our child.
But I can spend the rest of my life refusing to become that man again.
I don't expect forgiveness.
I don't expect you to return.
I only want you to know that the woman I once called dramatic was the strongest person in my life.
And I was too proud to see it.
Damian.
I read the letter twice.
Then placed it beside the blue diary on my desk.
For a long time, I stared at both.
One contained the story of how I'd disappeared.
The other contained the beginning of an apology.
Neither could decide my future.
Only I could.
That evening, I called Damian.
“Would you like to have dinner?”
He went silent.
Then asked:
“Are you sure?”
I smiled faintly.
“Yes.”
We met at a small restaurant near the harbor.
No private dining room.
No bodyguards.
No family members.
Just us.
We talked about the bookstore.
His work.
My health.
The changes we'd made.
Then I asked:
“Do you still love me?”
Damian looked at me.
“Yes.”
I swallowed.
“Even if I never come back?”
He nodded.
“Yes.”
I studied him.
Then I said:
“I still love you too.”
His eyes filled.
“But love isn't enough.”
He nodded.
“I know.”
I continued.
“If we ever try again, it has to be different.”
Damian leaned forward.
“Tell me what you need.”
I smiled sadly.
“For once, I want us to figure that out together.”
May you like
He nodded.
And for the first time in years, the future didn't feel like a decision someone else had already made for me.
